Back In the Chair

Had treatment today. Blah. So hard to sit there knowing the amniotic fluid could drop again and hurt Anya. Still after 2 weeks off Herceptin, the fluid went up to 9! It is hard to believe that I was hospitalized a few weeks ago because it was only 4. Hopefully this big cushion will last or at least keep the number in the "low but safe" range. If not, well, I'll just skip a few more Herceptin treatments. I'm at 28 weeks now. Third trimester. Home stretch. I'm excited to see her, but I don't want her to come too soon. I keep telling her to stay where she is for a few more months, but I doubt that will happen. On top of low fluid she's falling behind in growth. That could mean she's just small (I'm only 5ft tall, husband only 5'10 so not expecting a giant) or it could mean some growth restriction. Nothing is ever easy in my world! Despite that, my top complaint this week was how itchy and irritating my stretch marks are. My doc laughed and congratulated me for having a "normal" pregnancy complaint.

Great news!

Anya's fluid is up to 7.5! She's LOVING not having treatment so we're taking another week off. Then it's back to the chair for us.

No Herceptin

Last week I decided to postpone my Herceptin treatment. My Oncologist was very supportive and told me I could take 1-2 weeks off. I'm going for 2. Hopefully baby Anya will enjoy the time off as much as I will. Next sonogram is tomorrow, Wednesday the 19th. Amniotic fluid must stay up! Drinking liquids like crazy even though it isn't proven that it helps. Thanks to Renee for telling others about me, and to all of you who have posted nice things.

PS My last MRI came back negative! No new brain mets for me. Of course they couldn't do a contrast scan because of Anya, but as far as they could tell it was clear. Anya didn't like the noise and got all fidgety, but they kept it short and as quiet as possible.

Baby Scare

Been in the hospital for a few days because Anya's amniotic fluid was dangerously low. I was on IV fluid for 3 days, had 2 iron infusions, and 2 steroid shots. Luckily the fluid came up and they allowed me to go home on moderate bed rest. I was terrified because if the fluid didn't come up then the baby was at a high risk for being stillborn. They were talking about a c-section and I'm only at 24 weeks! Babies that young don't do very well outside the womb! The steroids they gave me were to boost her lungs just in case she had to be born. All along we assumed she'd be early for one reason or another. We were hoping for 36 weeks (8 months). I hope she does make it that long but with this scare I'm terribly afraid I'm going to have a very sick and dangerously premature baby on my hands.

I keep thinking, "I've done this to her. To keep me alive I've risked her life!" That's because the low fluid could be due to my Herceptin treatments. But my ob wasn't so sure. It's been so hot in Seattle and I wasn't drinking like I should so she thinks that was a major contributor, especially since the fluids did come back up after constant IVs and a few days in an air-conditioned hospital room.

So now I rest as much as I can, which makes me feel useless and pathetic. I'm still wilting in the sticky heat although the temp has come down out of the hundreds! Trying to drink often, but it makes me feel uncomfortable to be that full of liquid all the time. Grrr! But I'll do whatever I must to keep her happy and healthy inside me.

I have an appointment to talk to my onc about postponing my next Herceptin treatment for a few weeks. My next treatment isn't until mid-Aug, and if I can postpone it until Sept, then I'll be at 30 weeks and the baby would have a much better (although not great) shot at surviving if she has to come out early.

In addition to bed rest (so most of my calories and fluid goes to her) they want me to eat a ton more calories because if she does come early she'll be better off if she's a good size. Nutritionists came by to talk to me in the hospital and were joking that they don't often advise people on how to eat more calories.

I'm one very worried momma right now! I keep resting my hands on my stomach hoping she's okay.