This is My Life

The holidays were rough, but I made it through. The last CT scan showed improvement, but Dr. Lee's not ready to call it quits. So, there's still no end in sight. It's finally beginning to take its toll on me. My mind doesn't work as well as it used to. My body is worn out. I've tried to keep these posts positive for the most part, so I've left out a lot of the unpleasant details. Truth is I'm sick and tired of being sick. On top of the treatments, my body has been forced into menopause resulting in hot flashes, night sweats, and all the other wonderful things I didn't expect to experience until much later in life. The weight gain as a result of the steroids (they control nausea) is depressing, and I can't really exercise because my heart has been weakened by treatment. The acid reflux is god awful, I swear one good belch and I'll spew acid. I get up, I work, I come home and crash. This is my life now. I sigh. Forgive me for my self-pity. It's been an especially difficult week.